A Special Request

The nice thing about a blog is that I can write on any subject. I have chosen to keep this blog to things that matter, spiritually. Tonight's post has a bit of a different tone to it, because it involves the kids. The subject is still "important" despite the change in theme!

My kids love to be read to. This didn't happen by accident. I wanted my children to love reading, so I have read to them... their whole lives. There is one who does not like to read himself... but they do all love to be read to.

We read at bedtime, and we read at lunchtime. There are other times occasionally, but those are the two main times. We try to read books that all of them will enjoy, which happens to be the "older" Dr. Suess, fables, more involved stories or fairy tales, and Rebecca (3) will even put up with a chapter from a chapter book. We have our Bible story book (The Child's Story Bible,Catherine, Vos), and we've been reading through Matthew all together. (too slowly)

The other day at lunch, the kids were asking for a story. Since we are not currently in the middle of reading any chapter book... I got our Bible story book. They were excited about this, but someone wanted to read the Bible instead. Then a couple of them got the idea to "read the whole Bible"! I got the request, from excited lips, for me to read the entire Bible to them!

Whoa!

And my first reaction?

I don't know what yours would have been, but I thought, "The Bible is a LONG book! What am I committing to???" I actually considered the math, and calculated how many years at a chapter a day it would take to read through... or if we read 2 chapters a day. In all honesty, I was not excited. I like their enthusiasm... but that would be a lot of work!

Then I caught myself. What was I reluctant about? My kids (Oh blessed thought!) wanted, excitedly, to hear the WHOLE BIBLE. Many mom's don't even GET that request! They WANT to hear God's word. They WANT to hear ALL of it. They want to listen to it, day after day, like we have done for many other books. (Some even almost as long, at least page-wise. I think the print was bigger though!)

This is a good thing, and I can gladly commit to reading it to them.

So... this is what we have started. (I still can hardly believe we are attempting it!) With interest running high we have read the first 3 chapters of Genesis. (It would have been 2, but I got the request for a second chapter today!)

We will read through the New Testament at the same time... and there will be lots of opportunities for good conversation. I am looking forward to it (though still a bit scared of the commitment this was!) and praying for God's blessing.

When I put the kids to bed last night, and heard my son pray for God to "help him love Him more," I was moved. THIS is what life is about. I should not be afraid to read the WHOLE Bible to children who are excited to hear it! So, we are going to dive right in, and see what the Lord does.

Keep reading, everyone! You don't know what it might lead to!

Perspective

I have trouble with perspective. I forgot today, again, that God holds all things in His hands. Something extremely troubling crossed my path, and I felt like my "fate" was in the hands of my fellow man. I didn't like that feeling at all.

Actually, I very quickly succumbed to that thought! I just could no longer "stand" or go on.

This is such a dangerous place to be. Right when it was happening, in the midst of "steering off-track", I told myself, "I know God is in control, but I don't know what he will do!" Translation: I was not "okay" with God being in control, since I didn't know what He would do. I didn't know what the outcome would be, and I was ONLY going to be okay with ONE outcome... the one I had picked!

But, saying the words, "I know God is in control," somehow made it feel like I was on the right path, despite my miserable feelings.

Thankfully, God, in His mercy, did not let me go on long in this way. He reminded me that He IS in control. Even when it looks like "man" holds my future, it is God who is ultimately in control, and I can rest in that!

The Lord also showed me that I need to trust Him with WHATEVER happens. It hasn't happened yet. My saying, "I don't know what God will do" was not said in faith. I was saying correct words, but behind them I was thinking something terrible. I was thinking that it would only be okay (with me) if He worked it out in the way that I chose!

He reminded me that I need to trust Him, even before-hand, with whatever it is he does, whether it is what I "want" or not. He also reminded me that it is a very sweet place to be trusting Him. The world can be raging all around me, but when I'm trusting Him, it can't touch me. "O bless our God, ye people, and make the voice of his praise to be heard: Which holdeth our soul in life; and suffereth not our feet to be moved." (Psalm 66:8-9) THIS is where I want to be. (always)

Thankfully I was able to talk to a couple of people, pray, and God straightened my thinking out. He IS in control, and I CAN trust Him with it, even if I don't know what will happen.

As I went through the rest of the day, a couple of things struck me about my struggles. First, my whole struggle today was summed up in Psalm 46 verse 6. "The heathen raged, the kingdoms were moved: he uttered his voice, the earth melted." This was exactly what I was looking at today. I was seeing the "heathen rage" and it was not pleasant. I did not want to be under their sway!

This verse contains amazing truth, because first "The heathen raged," THEN, "The kingdoms were moved"! Not only did the heathen threaten, but the kingdoms were actually troubled because of this. Something happened and it was not pleasant.

Now look at what God did. "He uttered His voice." And when God spoke? "The earth melted."

Ah. This is my verse for today! I was so worried about what is a very real threat, but I forgot that when God speaks, the earth melts. Whoa. This is my God, and He is on my side.

"What shall we then say to these things? If God be fore us, who can be against us? He that spared not his own Son, but delivered him up for us all, how shall he not with him also freely give us all things?" (Romans 8:31-32) "For thou hast delivered my soul from death: wilt not thou deliver my feet from falling, that I may walk before God in the light of the living?" (Psalm 56:13)

I need not worry. I will trust Him.

Then tonight for our bedtime story, we read about the time Jesus walked on water. I don't usually consider a child's story Bible a thing to minister to a grown person's soul, but tonight God used our story together to help me.

What happened today was I was fine while trusting God. But when I looked at the waves around me, I sank, just as Peter started to sink when he looked around at the waves instead of at Jesus.

I could say more, but I don't know how to. I am just so thankful that God works in our hearts, and brings us back to Himself when we start to wander! (Just like Jesus stretched out His hand to Peter when he started to sink!)

It is an "easy" place to be, if I am trusting the Lord, no matter WHAT storms rage about me. Praise God!

"Spirituality"

This is a tough one.

I am in difficult circumstances, because my husband has turned from God and become an "atheist". We have a family, and that makes for a lot of difficult things along the way!

When I hear, "I could never do what you do," it is a grief to me. First of all, in my own heart, it makes me not want to "be different", but God has been dealing with me on that. (We, as Christians, are supposed to be different!)

Secondly, it is a grief to me because I think it is an excuse to us. (Yes, "us", myself included.) When we look at another person and say, "I could never follow God the way they do," we are excusing ourselves from trying.

Here we are, walking through this world, and God has chosen to love us and use us. (...and much more, but let's stop there.) When He places us in a difficult situation to show His love to us and use us to glorify Himself, He gives the grace! It is not something we can do on our own! This is true! But in Him, we can. We can do whatever He asks us to do, because he gives us the power to do it.

We can all know, with 100% certainty, that in whatever trial God brings our way, He will give the grace to go through it. We can do it. Let's not make excuses, or over-spiritualize someone whom God is helping. I hear it from others, and I'm sure I do it to others. Let's, rather, look at our own struggles and work at discerning how God would have us to meet them. (to His glory!) And let's look at others' struggles with a fear of God and His ways, full of praise for His work!

Lord,

Here I am before You, a woman hurt by this world, but upheld in Your hand! This life is hard, and full of pain, but You are much more than what makes up for that! You have blessed abundantly! You have given me a new heart that finds unspeakable joy in You.

These are hard days, but they drive me to You! Oh Lord, keep working in me. Keep teaching me.

People look at me and say, "I could never be as spiritual as that." But it is not true! This is just what happens when You teach Your children (even by trials!) and they listen and follow You.

This is none of my own strength. It is all You.

Oh, Father, teach me more, even though it hurts. You are my life. This is a good place to be. (Oh help me as I struggle!!!!!!)

Amen.

Shew me thy ways, O Lord; teach me thy paths. Lead me in thy truth, and teach me: for thou art the God of my salvation; on thee do I wait all the day. (Psalm 25:4-5)

Reason for Praise!

"For you have delivered my soul from death, yes, my feet from falling, that I may walk before God in the light of life." (Psalm 56:14, ESV)

What promise there is in this verse, for all of us! God has delivered the soul of every Christian from death, that we may walk before God in the "light of the living". (KJV)

What beautiful words, for a day that seems difficult.

As the verse before speaks of, I will praise my God this day!

"Tomorrow"

Today I am unsure of the future. I am tempted to worry about what is not known. There is enough before me, today, to make me feel very sad.

I'm sure everyone understands, because we are all faced with this when things go "wrong" and we don't know what is going to happen.

My thought this morning is, that I will most likely be alive tonight. (Although this is in God's hands too!) Another day will have passed, and I will have survived it. I will (likely) go to bed tonight in the same situation, but looking ahead on my day like this, I realize that the amount of pain in this day is likely going to be much less than I imagine on myself (for today) by worrying about it!

What God has ordained to happen, will happen.

I suppose it is just another lesson in "worry". I have learned a lot about worry already, and I don't think I am one who is particularly prone to be worried. But my temptation (and subsequent lesson!) today is to think since it is all happening now I am allowed to worry about it because it is "today".

I like Matthew 7:34, where Jesus said, "Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof." I should not worry about "tomorrow". But what about what is happening, today?

Well, actually, in worrying about today, I have been imagining trouble on myself, that probably won't happen today. I can leave it all in God's capable hands while focusing on simply being a faithful servant/child.

As I think ahead to my condition tonight, I am sure that I will not be faced with more than I can handle. (I Corinthians 10:13) At the same time, I am very sure that I could imagine up more difficulty than I will actually face, if I spend my time worrying about what might happen today!

How easy it can be to slip into thinking, "I am right for my worry!" Let's rather heed Jesus' advice just prior to wrapping up the "worry" passage, to "Seek first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all of these things [our earthly needs] will be added unto you." (Matthew 6:33, slightly paraphrased) They will be (we will be!) taken care of.

Lord, help us to have a right focus. Our life, as Christians, is all about You. We need not worry. Our focus is to be on You, in how to live for you through difficulty! Help me, this day, to keep my focus on You, not worrying, but rather striving to serve you in whatever difficulty You see fit to bring accross my path.

Thank You for Your help!

Not What I Expected (Child Sleep Issues)

My youngest daughter is 3 1/2 years old. Tonight she was very tired. She was nearly closing her eyes as I was tucking her in to bed! This is unusual, but I love nights like this because it means she will fall asleep QUICKLY. Ahh, the bliss of not having to stay up there and "police" her!

Tonight it hit me. It has been a long time. She has never been a good sleeper, and the worst part has been getting her to go to sleep. Now she is 3 1/2, and I am GLAD I didn't know, at the beginning, that 3 1/2 years later I'd still be sitting up there by her room until she fell asleep, just to make sure she DID go to sleep. (Not wandering around, crawling onto her sibling's beds, talking, playing with stuffed animals, and generally just keeping herself awake!)

It is a reminder that life is not usually exactly what we had expected or hoped for. In this case, a 6th child (meaning lots of experience!) should be easy. I should know what I am doing by now. Ha! She (and the Lord!) had different ideas. I have spent countless hours of my life "waiting" for her to fall asleep almost every night (and nap) since.

The one good thing that I have learned to appreciate is that it gives me a large chunk of "quiet time" that I am free to spend with the Lord. (Maybe it is the way He chose to ensure I have "time" for Him throughout each day!)

But tonight, I am thankful for an already-sleeping family, INCLUDING my youngest. :)

How Can I Live This Life? (A Prayer, II Cor. 1:9)

"But we had the sentence of death in ourselves, that we should not trust in ourselves, but in God which raiseth the dead:" (II Corinthians 1:9)

I need this truth tonight, Lord! I feel like there is such a level of opposition and conflict in my life... not just between myself and business associates or a boss, or between myself and other people in my life... but it is right here, between my husband and I!

How can I stand it? How can I stand, another moment, to be the object of what he despises most? This is not something I can "seperate" from the rest of my life... and be "okay" when I am home and away from it. This IS my life. This is every day, every hour. Hardly a thought goes by that does not somehow include him. He is my husband! And he hates Christ in me.

How can I live this?

I am so glad for the hope that is in Your word. Here is more hope that you sent me when I most needed it, and I was able to say it again and again to myself, just to keep perspective and not slip into depression. I feel this "sentence of death" in myself. I am "pressed out of measure, above strength"! (previous verse) I surely despair...

It is not the very same circumstances, but I am in over my head, just like they were. All of my hopes and dreams for life, and my "earthly comfort" in circumstances that allow me to feel loved and stable are GONE... "But I had the sentence of death in myself [in loosing all that I have hoped for here – Lord, You know] that I should not trust in myself, but in You, who raise the dead."

Here I am at my lowest, unable to percieve how I can go on another moment, sprialing downward into depression... when You remind me it is not me but You in me. I may not have the strength in what I meet with in life... but You are my strength, so this is as it should be. I tend to think, "This hurts too much, I can't stand it!" but those are the very times that You will carry me through. "But I had the sentence of death in myself [I couldn't go on, in my own strength] that I should not trust in myself, but in You, who raise the dead." Sure, perhaps I can not bear another whithering look, or another sharp word, but this is on You. "Cast your burden up on the Lord, and He will sustain you." (Psalm 55:22) "For ye are dead, and your life is hid with Christ in God." (Colossians 3:2)

Lord, this is rich truth. You are helping me in the storm, right now. Thank You! Help me to see more of Your truth in my everyday life!

Here I am, "fainting", and You say, "It is okay." I was half panicked, distressed at the thought of even another moment under my husband's displeasure (for Your sake), but Your word speaks to this. It is not me that goes on. It is not me, alone, that bears up under such tremendous pressure. That is You, and You surely have strength enough to carry me through.

Thank You, Lord.

Help me to continue in Your love... enduring to the end. May my life be lived to the praise of Your glory! May it cry out "Blessed is the Name of the Lord!" at every opportunity.

Thank You for Your reminders tonight. Thank You for loving me and making me Your Own!

Amen.